TEN DAY CHALLENGE
Biz Gainey
“Pornography sites trump Twitter, Amazon and Netflix combined with more than 450 million visitors per month. Internet sex sites are responsible for close to 30 percent of all the bandwidth consumed on the internet on any given day. Is that crazy or what? And it isn’t just a small percentage of the population that is watching sex. Somewhere around 65-70 percent of men reading this article, and 30 percent of women, look at porn. Research shows that almost 70 percent of boys have had some exposure to pornography by the time they reach 11 years old and 97 percent of girls have viewed pornography by age 16.”[i]
I’ve been tracking porn culture for about 20 years. My personal story is one of walking away from porn addiction and into a porn-free life. It’s rare that I am surprised by what I read or hear regarding porn consumption these days.
The quote above, however, surprised me in one way: porn is more popular than Netflix.
I love Netflix!
Americans love Netflix!
The world loves Netflix!
We love, it seems, porn more!!
If this is the case and if you are struggling with porn consumption and addiction, then I invite you to take Men Against Porn’s Ten Day Challenge. We are going to, as a community, take the first ten days of August (or any ten days, pending when you read this article) and try to push porn down the popularity ladder a bit. I’d encourage you to share this challenge with your friends, family, neighbors, colleagues, etc. The challenge is one we can all take – whether we are hooked to porn or not.
In fact, if you aren’t struggling with porn addiction but you know someone who is – and genuinely love someone who is – taking this challenge with them might be a great way to partner with them. It may be a road on which you rebuild trust, support your friend, loved one, and grow together in the hope of a porn-free fully human life.
Join me.
Join us as we commit to pushing back against porn’s assault.
Take the challenge. You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain!
MAP TEN DAY CHALLENGE
DAY 1: DEVELOPING SCREEN FREE ZONES
Begin and end your day by being ‘screen free.’ I suggest crafting the first thirty – sixty minutes and the final thirty – sixty minutes of your day as screen-free zones. You may be surprised at how ‘hooked’ you are to social media and technology. Such a simple exercise should help you approach your day and night differently – more at peace.
DAY 2: DISABLING APPS AND NOTIFICATIONS
Today’s challenge invites us to disable our social media apps and/or turn off all notifications. We are bombarded with useless chatter throughout our day. Our social media apps provide most of this chatter. If you can’t go a whole day, then just commit to one ‘block’ of your day, such as morning, afternoon, or evening.
DAY 3: OPENING ONE SCREEN AT A TIME
Today’s challenge invites us to utilize one screen at a time. In other words, if you have your computer screen up, then put your phone aside. If you have your Xbox on, then put the computer, tablet, smartphone, etc. down. One screen only – throughout the day.
DAY 4: PRACTICING GRATITUDE THROUGHOUT THE DAY
Today’s challenge invites us to go through our day with a particular focus on being grateful for what we have and where we are in life. Shifting our focus toward gratitude might give us greater clarity on our addictions and struggles. Specifically, take a few minutes and jot down three – five reasons you have to be thankful. Carry those reasons with you throughout your day. Porn leverages ingratitude and tricks us to click on what it offers to ease the pain.
DAY 5: EXPLORE AND DISCOVERY DAY – AM I AN ADDICT?
Many people aren’t sure if they are or aren’t addicted to pornography. Today’s challenge invites us to take a simple test to assess our proclivity toward and participation in this addiction. There are many such tests available online. I am providing a link to a test that xxx church provides. Just click the link and follow the instructions. https://www.xxxchurch.com/start-here/am-i-addicted-to-porn-test
DAY 6: MEANINGFUL COMMUNITY DAY
Today’s challenge invites us to involve ourselves in one significant community moment. Here are some ideas to help guide you:
Dinner together as a family.
Grabbing drinks with your colleagues after work.
Find a church or local house of worship.
Perhaps you simply walk around your neighborhood and strike up a thoughtful and caring conversation with your neighbors.
If you’re married, then a date night might be in order.
Maybe you want to hang out with one of them – with no screens.
The options are endless. This challenge will require that you connect face – face, rather than screen – to a screen!
DAY 7: UNDERSTAND PORN’S POWER AND PERVASIVENESS
Today’s challenge invites us to understand, on a deeper level, how pervasive porn has become. My suggestion is that you read an article or two that identifies how porn changes the structure of our brains and how porn is gradually shaping the infrastructure of our culture. I am going to provide some links to websites that will help:
http://fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts-2/
http://www.covenanteyes.com/e-books/
DAY 8: POSITIVE INPUT ONLY
Today’s challenge invites us to ‘turn off’ any input that is negative and demeaning. Many of us listen to song lyrics that demean others. We often involve ourselves in conversations that tear others down. We love the social media sites that are hyper-critical and mean-spirited. We watch movies, television programs, etc. that accentuate and exploit the worst parts of humanity. For one day we are going to say ‘no’ to all such input.
DAY 9: NO SCREENS BEHIND CLOSED DOORS
Today’s challenge might just be the most difficult one yet. This challenge invites us to leave our smartphones, computers, tablets, etc. in common areas. In other words, when we close a door, we shouldn’t have our screen with us. In other words, keep your screens out of closed offices, bedrooms, bathrooms, etc. Remember, it’s only for one day!
DAY 10: ACCOUNTABILITY AND ACTION STEPS
Today’s challenge invites us to take strategic steps toward accountability and action. One line of accountability is to install blocking/filtering software on your devices. Another might be confessing your problem to a friend or trusted loved one. Just put one accountability step in place. Next, take some time and develop three action steps you are going to take that will help protect you against porn’s power. These steps are designed to serve as a road map for your journey after this ten – day challenge is over.
DAY 11: CELEBRATE THE PAST TEN DAYS AND COMMIT TO THE NEXT TEN DAYS
Celebrate your successes so that you can accurately reflect on your failures. It’s a journey and a long one at that!
Remember, as ones who have been there and done that; we are here to walk with you and assist you on your long journey home.
If you find our resources to helpful to you and those you love, we ask that you share them with your friends, neighbors, and communities!
Together we can experience a porn-free life and realize the end of porn addiction in our life-time!
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[i] http://www.floridatoday.com/story/life/wellness/2016/07/26/ronsisvalle-problem-pornography/87499284/
